What does it really take to change the way we think about aging — and build a community that proves it?
Bernadette Wagner, founder and CEO of Primetime for Women, has spent years doing exactly that. What started as a mission to bring women 40 and over together around three research-backed pillars — positive social connections, lifelong learning, and healthy lifestyles — has grown into a vibrant, intergenerational community rooted in a simple but powerful idea: give and gain.
From a weekly walking group that hasn't missed a single Wednesday in four years, to an International Women's Day conference that draws speakers from across the country, to a golf league for complete beginners called "Connections Over Competition," Bernadette shows us what it looks like to scale an organization without losing its soul. And she does it all as an all-volunteer nonprofit — fueled by community, collaboration, and the unshakeable belief that you don't know until you try.
There's a tension every leader of a B2B service has to navigate: How do you scale without compromising the quality of your services - or the values that drive them? The CEO's Heart for Service is where accomplished B2B leaders share hard-won insights on walking that tightrope.
Matt Wolfe: Hi, welcome back to the CEO's Heart for service. I am Matt Wolfe, partner and brand strategist at Brand3, and I'm here with Sarah Pattisall, an amazing brand strategist also at Brand3. Hi Sarah.
Sarah Pattisall: Yes. Hello. I'm happy to be here.
Matt Wolfe: We just got finished talking with Bernadette Wagner, who is the founder and CEO of Primetime for Women. She's just an amazing human being, let alone leader of an organization. Sarah, what did you take away from all this?
Sarah Pattisall: You know what was so fascinating to me, and really the root of this podcast and what we're trying to help figure out is when you have a heart for service, and you own a business, and you are scaling it, how do you retain that heart for service as you grow and you develop, and what listeners will hear.
And to me, what was so fascinating about Bernadette's story is that the way that she scales with the heart for service has to do with the same values that she is instilling in Primetime for Women as a whole, but then also encouraging women to explore. And you'll hear it in the podcast. Keep an ear out for phrases like give and gain. You don't know until you try. And just the level of authenticity and vulnerability and communication that go into her heart for service. And then also the women and the people of all ages who interact with and become a part of primetime for women.
Matt Wolfe: Yeah, we, we say here, we're trying to figure out how do you scale by preserving the quality of service and the values that drive them, the values that founded the organization. And she, yeah, she has a hundred percent won the day so far by being true to herself and leading the organization to be true to itself and its core values and really living into that. The other thing I picked up is just the power of simple. Things like leaving room for people to feel heard, to express their voices, and to help a leader find the solution. We are so, you know, when we're in the leadership seat, we feel so much pressure to bring all the answers to the table, and she's finding them through collaboration.
So let's hop over there, and I can't wait for everyone to meet Bernadette.
Matt Wolfe: And it is our honor to welcome Bernadette Wagner, founder and CEO of Primetime for Women, and we'll hear more about that in a moment. A wonderful nonprofit that is creating an inspiring, caring community that benefits women in their prime.
Hi, Bernadette.
Bernadette Wagner: Thanks for having me.
Matt Wolfe: You bet. Let's talk about Primetime for Women. Can you just tell us what, what does it do and who does it ?
Bernadette Wagner: So, Primetime for Women really has this idea about changing the script on aging. I would like to say that we start aging at every age, and I don't know why at one point, 40 over the hill came out, or 50-year-old or 60, everybody refers to you as a grandmother or granny. Not that I, I love being a grandmother, but these terms that can be diminishing, if that's the only thing you get to be, is not positive. So, I think what we started out looking at primarily reaching out to women 40 and over, that was our target when we first started. This idea that what are the three research-based factors that. Influence physical health, emotional well-being, and longevity. They are positive social connections, lifelong learning, and healthy lifestyles.
And so what I like to say when I do short talks is people, passion, and purpose. And I think we bring women together and we give them programs that emphasize those three things. And I will say, since we started in 2018, we've kind of branched out a little bit because the research says we are aging at every stage of life. And that many of the behaviors that people are practicing now in their thirties are gonna determine how well or how poorly they age. There's this idea that the eating habits, your engagement habits, your positive social connection skills, consolidated and and concentrated in your early thirties, and you need to be, they need to be aware of some of these.
So we're doing more outreach across all ages 'cause all people are aging.
Bernadette Wagner: We did a really cool event called Saturday in the Park for a year. Every Saturday in our community, we did an intergenerational program, and we had little kids all the way up to people in their eighties and the late, not early nineties, show up for these events. And we did programs that engaged everybody. We played games, we sang songs, we did treasure hunts, and we did all kinds of different things. And the idea was to bring people outside in nature, which is a big determining factor in health. new people together, making those connections. And they learned goofy songs, and they played goofy games.
They're learning. And one of the things they were learning is that connections matter. And so, it was a huge hit, and we did that for 12 months in a row. One time in the snow, one time when it was stinking hot. One time it was drizzling, but it didn't matter. It was really fun.
Matt Wolfe: I love the holistic approach to it. You know that you're looking at this from a full. Well, just that, I mean, holistic lens and all the different things that impact, I can't think of the words I'm trying to say anyways. Can you tell me a little bit more before we move on?
Matt Wolfe: Can you tell me a little bit more about the International Women's Day conference?
That's obviously a tent pole experience. And I know some of our team was there recently, and they loved it.
Bernadette Wagner: It's funny because when we talk about all the programs we do, we try to really hit on those three things. Connecting lifelong learning and healthy lifestyles. And the International Women's Day, we didn't start until a couple of years ago, this year was our third, but. It's been such a huge hit in our community, and this year we had probably too many wonderful speakers. We did a survey afterwards, and everybody was like, oh, this was great. So many wonderful speakers, but we didn't have downtime to just talk and process together. So that's good feedback for next year. But it's been really fun. We do it in partnership with our local college and we have had lots of businesses step up and sponsor the event. And, we are an all-volunteer nonprofit. Nobody gets paid. We used to get some grant funding from our local health department, but because of changes within the federal money going to the state and the state money going to the Washington County Health Department, we haven't gotten any funding in almost not quite two years.
So we pretty much do everything at, no cost. People make donations at our weekly program, but our International Women's Day conference, all the two of our speakers, well, all the speakers agreed to participate with us not paying any speaker fees. Did have some travel reimbursement that we gave to people who came from South Carolina and from up in New York State to come to travel, to be here to share their knowledge and their wisdom.
And all these women gave their time 'cause they wanna be seen and heard. And I can tell you, everybody there saw them, they heard them, they left inspired, and they learned something. They had a chance to connect with new people. I loved, at the end of the day, all these people with their cell phones doing all their different ways of sharing their contact information to me, they're connecting. They've learned, they're inspiring other people. They're saying, Hey, let's get together and we'll work on this. And I just think, to me it was, such a sense of validation that even though this is just a once-a-year program, all of our other programs are ongoing programs, but this is once a year. And to know that it has this kind of impact.
We had young women there, we had middle-aged women, we had older women there. And to me, that is what we're really looking to do, is not to say you're, you're, this is just an organization for people over a certain age, time for women still there. But I will also say we have lots of men who come to our Walking to Wellness group.
So, that's, we're also, I guess we're saying to ourselves mission is broader than the name of the organization. And we, we are all stronger, healthier, and happier together.
Sarah Pattisall: I love the sense of community that you are creating, and you're right, it is so, so important for everybody to, to have that community and, and yes, science tells us that is the case, but to actually live it and be a part of it and create it and invite others into it is just a really, really beautiful thing.
And yeah, I love it.
Sarah Pattisall: I need to come to your next thing.
Bernadette Wagner: Come.
Bernadette Wagner: So one of the things we do at Walking to Wellness, which is a weekly event on the first of May, we will have walked every single week for four years without missing once. Now that's. a lot. We've had 398 different people so far walk with us. But on any given Wednesday, we usually have like between 25 and 50 people show up. But we start every, we really do try to be research based. And the research says when people come as strangers, if you give them a shared story or shared content, then as they walk and talk, they have something to connect around. So, like last week we had somebody, Taylor Massey from Infinite Legacy.
She came and talked about their organization, which does organ and tissue donations. And then they also had brought a person who rich, who talked about receiving a liver transplant three years ago. And the idea was. After their talk and their presentation, they stayed and walked with our community, but also people went up and said, oh, I, I have a story to tell you. And do you know anybody who's had an organ donor? Are you registered at the DMV? Have you registered to be a donor? And it was just, you know, you could walk around. We walk on an indoor track, which we do again in partnership with the Washington County Parks and Rec. We don't have to pay to be there. Also. The Washington County Parks and Rec manages this track for the college. So we're at the college again. So when communities collaborate whether they're businesses or nonprofits or educational institutions, we better serve the needs. And this is free. It's open to the public. Nobody gets charged. But we've been doing this every week for four years. We often have physicians speak. We've had a lady do belly dancing, and even the men had on the little belly dancing scarfs. And I mean, it was great. The, the idea is we laugh, share our joys and our sorrows. Sometimes people cry. but one of the greatest joys for me is some of these members now, especially the women, they've gone on vacations together.
They've invited each other to their granddaughter's baptism, where their grandson's wedding. To me, when there's real connections that take place outside of where we meet, that's when I know we are really fulfilling our mission.
Matt Wolfe: That is powerful. I think it means a lot to see an organization that is just standing up for the power of, and the importance of the opportunity to connect.
Matt Wolfe: And before we dig in on, the growth story and some of those things, I do want to ask for a moment. Why is it hard for women to make those connections?
I mean, it's clearly difficult that there was a need that brought this vision to life, right? So what.
Bernadette Wagner: I think.
Matt Wolfe: Is that problem that's being overcome?
Bernadette Wagner: I think women tend to do a better job at connecting than men. Just socially we have been socialized that way. But I think when I was looking at the data, when women retire and they're no longer going into their job, they lose the connections of people they used to see, especially those that are still working. The other thing that happens is as people age, they lose loved ones friends, dear companions, because either illness or one of the things that happened divorce rate among older Americans is skyrocketing. used to be people just stayed in relationships and I think suffered maybe not in silence, but did, didn't feel they had the options to separate and live more fully on their own. So I think there's a, a couple different things. I think health issues, I think retirement. And I also think. There is still, I think we're doing a better job about it, but I do still think that there's a societal story, a shared story of do what you never thought you could do. I mean, if you haven't done it by the time you're 50, then forget it.
It's not gonna happen.
Bernadette Wagner: You know, that's why we started this golf league. I went to our local Commission on Aging, which when we first started, they were supporting our effort with, secretarial skills and flyers and that kind of stuff, but they stopped supporting us because they only get funding if. The people in attendance are in their physical building. They don't do any programming off their site. So I didn't know that at the time. And I said, your property backs up to the city owned golf course. Why don't you start a golf league for women who've never golfed? And they said, we're not gonna do that. just thought I was a whack job. so I was complaining to somebody who works at the city's department of Recreation and I said, they wouldn't even engage with me about that. this woman said, well, why doesn't prime time for women do that? And I went, so I went home that night and I said to my husband, guess what? And he said, what? I'm gonna start a golf, golf league. And I was 44 at the time. He said, you've never even touched a golf club. I said, I know I'm learning and all that stuff. And you know, two years later I won this this. City's senior ladies tournament. But you know, that was a, I'm a pretty good athlete, but also there was only like eight women who competed, but it didn't matter, you know, this idea, I had never touched a golf club and just last week I bought three new clubs. I got fitted for three clubs. You know, it's exciting. I'm learning. It's continuing to grow.
Matt Wolfe: That's a powerful connecting point though. I mean, you're looking at three to four hours of people being able to talk and get to know each other. If they take the opportunity,
Bernadette Wagner: So, yeah. And you know, we only play it's a, a new league for people mostly who've never played before. have all these goofy rules that make it accessible to people who have never played they don't pay me money, but the city. Sponsors, they donate a little bit of money to us, and the money goes to the city of Hagerstown, which the city loves. And they, we are bringing people who have never golfed before into their course. And we brought in a golf pro to teach some lessons at their course. So this idea of, you know, we have something to give, but in giving, we also gain. And it works both ways. And I think that, especially with our golf league I think we've had like, 20 different women play. Some have stayed, others have graduated to more competitive golf leagues. That's good. They're, they're on, they're, the name of our golf league is connections over competition. Meaning the connections matter way more than how well you play golf. we always play a scramble format so that. If you've never played golf and you only hit the ball two inches, you can hit your next ball from where the best player hit. you can use tees in the fairway. Nobody scores more than double par. I mean, there, there's all these goofy rules. The idea is aren't turned off by not succeeding. They are allowed to succeed. And as they grow, they and learn the skill, they can give up using the tees in the fairway and they can start playing their own ball.
And the idea is that all this time they are connecting with other women. They are spending time outside. They are learning something new. And that's our three goals right there.
Matt Wolfe: Wow, outstanding.
Matt Wolfe: So in this, you have this wonderful variety of events and different forums and places where people can connect. Know, we call this the CEO's heart for service and nonprofits do nothing but serve. And so what, what does it mean for your nonprofit to, or let me ask you it this way, how does your nonprofit know that you've done a great job of serving the people coming to your events? How do you think about that?
Bernadette Wagner: We're getting ready to celebrate four years of walking to wellness. And about three weeks ago I said we're gonna have our fourth anniversary. If you haven't brought a friend to this organization, what are you going to do to let them know that we are here for them? And that we grow stronger, the more people who show up here and our community is healthier. When individuals are healthier, communities are healthier. And so it's been really fun to watch people bring in their friends that maybe they might not have invited them. This sounds silly, but most of the people who come to walking to Wellness we, we, I think our walking to wellness community, it serves a diverse group of people, but I would think the majority of them do not have gym memberships and would not have the opportunity to participate in a weekly event like this. And so, for me, at Christmas time, they gave me a gift card that had had $160 on it. And I'll tell you what, that was some kind of emotional gift for me because for those people to come up with that kind of money it meant a lot. It, it still means a lot.
Sarah Pattisall: Yeah, I, Bernadette, I can only begin to imagine how many women's lives that you've touched through primetime for women, and I'm sure you have a million thoughts and stories of that as well. I'm wondering if there are any specific individual stories that you'd be willing to share about how Primetime for Women has really.
helped somebody or helped them find their sense of community, and obviously you don't have to name names or anything, just anything that you're willing to share.
Bernadette Wagner: So, back in February um, a couple organizations made generous donations to support our international Women's Day Conference. And it came with 10 tickets two of those organizations gave me their tickets back. And so I had 20 tickets to give and the conference cost $75. And I was able to talk with different people at International Women's at, at our walking to wellness group and offer them to the conference if they'd like to come. it was really amazing. One lady was crying saying she, she went last year. Last year I'd also given her a ticket and she thought she'd never get a chance to go to another. and she's, she's a younger woman. She has a son who's like 10 She, she was just crying, saying what a gift it was that she could do that and that I could give it to her.
And I said, actually, I'm passing on a gift from somebody else, from one of our sponsors. And I said, you know, and I told her the conference is called this year's conference. The international theme this year was Give to Gain. And I said, I'm giving you this ticket and I can't wait to see what you give that others might gain.
And it was, it was a very emotional conversation. We're walking around the track and we're both crying, you know, one of those things. But you know, there, there's so many different opportunities. I when, during the pandemic, I did a program called A year of hikes, 52 weeks, 52 women, same trail.
And I hiked the same four mile section of the at with 52 different women. And you know, we hiked in snow that was up to my thigh. I am short, but it was deep snow and we hiked in 98 degree weather with the humidity where we were just soaking wet. But I think there is this thing that happens when you hike especially on a trail 'cause you're behind each other. I think your breathing sinks up and your steps sink up and you fall into a, a rhythm. I, I don't know if this is a real term, but I called it trail intimacy. I just think that stories come out and people share stories. And of course as I wrote the, the blogs about them, which are on our website. I can remember thinking that I am tracking how the seasons impact the flora and the sun, the, the fauna and the sun and the temperatures. But really what I was aware was how many of these women were sharing their stories because they wanted them to be heard. you know, it was just really was a gift for them to be so opened with me and to allow me to write their stories. And of course, I never published anything without giving them the stories first and saying, edit what you want. But people talked about, I, I can remember after the first couple months I started asking people, why did you sign up to do this hike? One lady said, I was turning 52, so I thought I should be one of the 52, which was a funny reason. Another woman has an autistic child she said is twice exceptional. And she wanted other people to know that twice exceptional children are here and they can make a difference. It's powerful when people share those things.
Sarah Pattisall: Yeah, the amount of, or the level of vulnerability that creating that environment allows for is just beautiful.
Bernadette Wagner: There are no interruptions. You know, there's like nobody else there. You're, you're surrounded by nature and it's just two people. And there was this tree that fell across the trail and I took a picture of almost every woman it looks like they're holding up this tree. And we called it the strong Woman pose. And almost every blog had a picture of the woman doing the striking, the strong woman pose, and knowing that no matter what they're dealing with or, or, and, and what they're celebrating. Some of them had such joyful, joyful stories to share. And that was just as exciting, but in a very different way, but just as vulnerable. Beause you know, people weren't thinking, oh, I'm bragging. They were thinking, no, I'm just sending what's happening in my life. And it's so happy. You know, I felt privileged all the way around.
Sarah Pattisall: Yeah, it all comes back to the idea you keep bringing up is that give and gain. You know, I'm gonna share my story and I'm gaining from that, and I'm also gaining your story in return. It's beautiful.
Bernadette Wagner: I think one of the other things that I know has made a big difference is we have a book club I think it's about 20 people. It was a little more than that. Some people left because the book club was getting too big. And some of the women said, it's hard for me to hear. You know, and there's that many people.
And so sometimes we break down in smaller groups. But one of the things that's really been interesting to me, and I think this is one of those lifelong learning moments, two women in particular never really read books until they joined Prime Time for Women's Book Club. They had been regular walkers at Walking to Wellness, and they're like. What, what if I sat down and really read books? And, you know, in the beginning some of them listened. We had people who would come to the book discussions. So we always say that our book club discusses typical book stuff like setting and character development, climax and all that stuff. But we, the biggest part of our book club where it differs is we talk about how this story intersects with our lives.
And it's an opportunity to be seen and heard and to have somebody hear your stories and maybe you even get to inspire them or they get to come back and say something kind or generous later on. And so, to me, to have two women regularly reading books now every single month, who had never even thought that was possible for them is that, that's lifelong learning right there.
Matt Wolfe: This is so powerful. What stands out to me is. Is the power of simple elemental things that you have embraced. the power of being seen and heard of, having the opportunity to connect. And as we're talking about those things, those are all things that I just keep thinking, boy, we need way more of that. We need way more space and time and room and permission for all of those things. So this is getting me really excited to see, I wanna see you keep scaling and growing. I wanna see these programs keep emerging out there. I was I was, I love that when you said that, that men are coming to the experiences as well. It took, I was just home for a family funeral and I was around the women in their prime that I've grown up with my, my whole life. And it always takes me back to holidays and I. I, you know, everyone eats the big meal. And then in my family, at least the guys were treated to go watch the ball game. And then the women sat around the table and they connected and they told stories and they were sharing their sense of humor and their experience and wisdom.
And there was an energy crackling around that table I knew something wonderful was happening. And that's where I would hang out.
Bernadette Wagner: Yeah.
Matt Wolfe: interested in the ball game. I was like, something good is happening over here and I need that too, and I need to experience that. You know, empathy, connection, stories being shared.
So, I just think it's all wonderful and, and I want it to grow.
Matt Wolfe: And so I want to reflect a bit on your growth story. Like we said, we, we try to understand here, how do you grow without compromising, you know, what you've built, the quality of what you offer people, the values behind it. So I'm curious, have you seen some moments in growing primetime for women where you've seen challenges and you realize, Ooh, delivering this experience or holding on to this thing that's so important to us will be really, is gonna get tricky as we grow.
Bernadette Wagner: Yeah, I think like, we did this fundraiser called Dine with Prime, and I had, I, I love to cook, that's one of my things. I, did do a, a year long program called Cultures Cooking and Connections, where I cooked with 12 different women from 12 different cultures. And I wrote about that I thought, oh, I'm going to make dying with Prime like that.
I'm gonna do a monthly event, but I'm gonna limit it to eight women and I'm gonna have somebody come and be the focus guest and we'll do this every month. we've done two it's a lot different when I'm preparing food and serving and I had to go out and buy nice dishes 'cause it was kind of, promoted as a nicer event.
And it was for people who had money. 'Cause we needed some money. But. I, I still love the idea but it is much harder to scale that. And especially I'm doing it in my home and you know, my husband's a hundred percent behind all the wacky ideas I do. But you know, I remember the last time we did a dime with Prime.
He said, I'm going out. And he came back and we were all still here. And he's like, ah, I thought you said this was going to be like from seven to nine. It's like almost 10 o'clock. I said, I know. but there are some things that have been a little harder than I thought, you know, you don't know if you don't try. And I think, maybe going forward, part of what's going to be important for us to, maybe, I don't know that we're gonna be in a position to get grant funding. I would love to get a board member who could write some grants for us. I don't, at this time, we don't have the money to pay for a grant writer. actually reached out to a grant writer and said, you could have a portion of the grant. And she said, we're not allowed to do it that way. I was like, I thought that was a pretty good idea, but they said no. So, you know, I, I am hoping that as we grow as we get a little bit more visibility, that we have somebody who would say, Hey, we'd like to either serve as a, you know, grant writer for the organization or maybe serve on the board and that could be their contribution. My concern is right now if I'm honest be 69. Wanna keep doing this. I'm not ready to stop. No way, no how. But when I am ready to stop, I'm not sure who would step in and pretty much full-time for no payment.
Bernadette Wagner: So
Matt Wolfe: Hmm.
Bernadette Wagner: Think, you know, if I'm being honest, I get so much out of this, you know, my, I have five kids, and they say, " Mom, you know, most people paid to work, and you pay so you get to work."
And I said, yeah, that's sort, sort of true. But I also get more than I give for sure. And so, but I don't know that you would find another CEO to step in and do it the way I'm doing it, so that that's, that's a struggle.
Matt Wolfe: It's interesting, though. Your mission is so compelling in what it's accomplishing, and it feels like there has to be someone out there who would take that on.
Bernadette Wagner: Or maybe someone, maybe, maybe this is where you have a particular CEO, but you have a shared role. Collaboration's my big thing. So I think maybe you would have co-CEOs or
Matt Wolfe: That makes a lot of sense.
Bernadette Wagner: This year, when I was planning International Women's Day, I got a call from a physician in our community, Dr. Metesh Kaari, and I don't know him really well.
I know him to sort of say hi. He's never been, my doctor. My husband was a physician at the same hospital for years. But he called, and he has a I guess a fund at our local community foundation. And, he said, I've been looking into what you're doing. I've been seeing your organization, and really, I can't believe you're doing this for International Women's Day.
I don't know how you're doing it with no funds, blah, blah, blah. He said, I just wanna make a difference. And he made a very generous donation. And, you know, I didn't ask for that. I don't know him that well. But to me, he knows that he thinks that what we're doing is making a difference and that that is incredibly validating and makes me think that there is a way forward. I, I just think if you say you can't do something, you can't. But if you say, I can do it, maybe
Sarah Pattisall: Yeah. One of the things I just wanted to say quickly is that what I think is really beautiful and compelling in this story is the parallels between the mindset that you inspire in other women and the mindset that you have as a founder and CEO with your heart for service. You don't know until you try.
And that is what you're telling women. You know, you won't know if you enjoy this or you won't know if you can do it until you try, and we are giving you the space to try. And then that is also how you are going about navigating prime time for women and creating these opportunities. And I, I just think that's very beautiful, and I, you don't know until you try.
Bernadette Wagner: I really appreciate you saying that, Sarah. I'm not sure I could've articulated it any better, but thank you for that. That's really nice to hear.
Matt Wolfe: What are some other challenges? Can you think of other challenges as you were growing and you realized, Ooh, we're trying to deliver a consistent experience. We're trying to take care of people in the same way, and this is getting hard.
Bernadette Wagner: Yeah.
Bernadette Wagner: When we first started walking to Wellness, we were meeting in parks, and we had this idea that we would be in outside parks, and we started in May of 2022. It was beautiful walking for the first six weeks. And people loved the idea that we started every walking session with somebody from the public speaking, either a physician, a community member, or whoever, somebody who had a story to share. But people were hot, especially for some of the seniors that wasn't comfortable walking. Then we had a woman who told me that she was gonna keep coming to hear the presentations, but she wasn't gonna walk 'cause her vision was so poor that she couldn't see the slight changes in the walking path we were on. It wasn't really steep, but it was not really level either. I just did not wanna let it go. And so I started reaching out, and that's when I contacted the county at first. Parts and recreation department, and they said, well. We managed for the college, but the college would need to say, it's okay for us to let you all use. So anyhow, that became this collaborative effort, and we made it happen within a timeframe that we were able to move onto an indoor track where it's air-conditioned in the summer and it's level. It's light lit in the winter, when it's dark and rainy outside, and it's heated in the winter, and it just makes it possible.
It, and it was one of those things, I don't have any trouble walking outside, so sometimes I need to be reminded. You're just one person, and everybody else has their needs and their goals and their expectations. It was a good lesson for me to be broader in how I started planning things and events, and how to make these events accessible.
I was on board with, how do you make it possible for people to do things who don't have a lot of money? How do you make it possible for people of different ages to come together? But I hadn't really considered the walking environments. And so, that was a good learning lesson for me, and we worked it out, thank goodness, with lots of community collaboration.
Matt Wolfe: Yeah. Any other stories that stand out in your mind of where the experience or the values behind it were? It was an ACEC challenge to hang on to that, as you were growing,
Bernadette Wagner: Well, sounds crazy.
Bernadette Wagner: I don't know if you know what a smoothie bike is, but it has a blender attached to it, and you pedal, and you put fruit and healthy ingredients while you're exercising, and people are surrounding you. So it was the three things that we liked. So I didn't have any money to do this. So a lady donated a beat-up old bike, and the uh, former CEO of Meredith Hospital, his wife was a friend of mine, and he's very mechanical. I took the bike to Annapolis, and he somehow attached a blender to this thing and put new pedals on it. And brought it back here, and we took that bike to our Saturday in the park events, which I mentioned earlier. But it kept breaking and breaking, and so I was like, Ugh, I just don't want to let this go. And so, it really was a fun thing for everybody of all ages. And then they had this healthy snack to eat. And so I actually wrote a grant proposal to the Washington County Health Department, and this was a couple of years ago, and they funded it in full. So now we have a professional-made smoothie bike, and we can take it to events like the Hagerstown Run Fest or to the Boonsboro Boonsboro Days Fair. And the idea is it can now actually be a source of revenue for us. 'cause we can charge a little bit of money to have people make a snack instead of going over and buying more french fries.
They can get something a little healthier. And, but that was, that was a, it took me a while to get there. I mean, I tried, I had that bike fixed so many times people were running away from me saying, don't ask me to look at that beat up bike again. But it led to a real smoothie bike. So.
Matt Wolfe: I've never heard of that, but I kind of.
Bernadette Wagner: I'll have to send you a little video of it. It's pretty cute.
I'd probably end up trying to make a milkshake with it, which might defeat the point, but
Bernadette Wagner: Yeah. We, we did have,
Matt Wolfe: At least I would earn it.
Bernadette Wagner: There, there was I took it down to Williamsport, and the mayor's on the bike, and he asked me if I could bring it to Canal Days, and he said, but we're gonna put we're gonna make margaritas in the smoothie bush. I said, " Well, there you go." I said that would cost a little bit more, but you know, it was, it was engaging, and he's on the bike saying, " Can we make some margaritas with this?"
And I just loved
Sarah Pattisall: Yeah.
Bernadette Wagner: You know, whatever.
Matt Wolfe: Well, it's a powerful marketing tool that you wouldn't have had otherwise, that you just didn't. Give up on it, there are a couple of themes I hear in the stories you're telling, at least from this side, that this idea of thinking outside the box, and also collaboration, and just asking, and in the spirit of connection, right? Probably just native to who you are and who this organization is. There's this natural predilection to reach out for help, what else somebody else knows. And I think. It's really interesting to take that and apply it to the folks listening to our podcast who are on the business side of things. I think, you know, that tends to be an instinct that comes later down the road for us to think about collaborating, to think about working together in new ways, to [think about shaking up the formula of what we do. All of that starts to feel really. Kind of scary or cumbersome as business leaders and for many nonprofits, but oftentimes it is the best way forward, right? We, our staff, did a thing the other day. People were asking, what are the words that we don't like the most to hear? And my answer was, we've never done it that way before. That was the one, that's the one that gets me. So I hear a lot of reminders in here to just really be creative and take risks in solving these problems
Bernadette Wagner: Yeah, I think in the business world, you could change connections from competition to collaboration. And I do think when businesses collaborate, I think you can have a mutual benefit. It's not a zero-sum game. I just feel like, we, especially in the American culture, we have so much sense of if I give, then I lose, you know, that has not been my life experience, you know, [00:39:00] maybe I grew up in a family of, you know, 11 people. I have eight brothers and sisters, and, you know, I never had my own socks until I went to college. We had a sock drawer, and I did get up earlier so that I would get the best socks in the sock drawer. But yeah, I competed for the Better Socks. But I mean, there was the sense that this was everybody's. And you know, I think that that can be a lesson that we can learn not just in the business world and not just in nonprofits, but in organizations and in families, you know, in neighborhoods. I think that's possible.
Sarah Pattisall: Yeah, I think what just really stands out to me in your story. And again, it's these themes that we keep coming back to, right? It's this idea of connection and community, and how important this is for women of all ages and people of all ages. And it is scientifically proven how important it is, and you are creating and fostering those environments.
And at the same time, it's those connections and communities that are making it even more possible for you to continue to foster those environments.
Bernadette Wagner: I love when I get a chance to do some public speaking and talk to people outside of the nonprofit sector because honestly, I think this is applicable in lots of areas. I think it's applicable in schools, foundation, in schools, and PTAs. I think it's applicable in church groups. I think it's applicable in businesses.
I think to myself that was when I used to do the TV show, it was really fun for me to have other people reach out and say, " Oh, you now come speak here. And it was, you know, just this idea that I wasn't saying anything different, but they were hearing what I was saying, and they were applying it to their business. yeah. So that, that to me was proof that these, I guess, tenants apply on a broader scale than sometimes we've been willing to think about.
Matt Wolfe: So when we think about growth, obviously, we're attached, we're called brand three, so we attach brand strategy to that very tightly because to us, brand strategy is just about telling the right story to the right people. It is telling the story of the relationship between the organization and the people it is meant to serve, and how it can serve best.
On the business side, we're always talking about ideal clients. Who is the ideal person to be the recipient of this? I'm curious, in your world, as you've been marketing primetime for women over the years, how has your story evolved and changed, or the way that you tell your story changed?
Bernadette Wagner: I think in the beginning, I didn't really reach out to men at all. But I will tell you a funny little thing. We have this big pop-up banner, and it's probably, I can't reach the top of it, and it's probably at least eight feet long, and I no longer put that up. When we go walking almost every Wednesday, when I get there, there are these three men who've taken it on themselves.
They put up the pop-up banner, and now I took this picture of them, and we always do a group picture of everybody who's there. And a couple of weeks ago, one of the guys, they're all real tall people, so he reaches up and it says, prime time for women. And he has the woes of women covered, and it says, prime time for men.
And so we now have some shirts that say Prime time for women and the smart men who support them, and some aprons that say that you know, this idea that, and I will tell you, Ray, and Skip and Dave. One of them tracks all of our participants and sends me a file every week of who was there.
That's how I know how many people we've had. And they send it to the health departments, 'cause the Health Department tracks that for funding. We have Ray collect the weekly donations and skip; he's a different way of collaborating. He's very connected to a lot of artists, and he has given me lots of like, beautiful, beautiful artwork that we sometimes raffle off or have like a little sale, and all that money, all those gifts came to us at no cost, but it's what he has to give.
Everybody has something different to give, but we all benefit when they do that. And so think that that's kind of a cool thing to say. Don't expect everybody to give the same way, but believe in other people. I think people want to give, I think people want to be appreciated. People want to be recognized, not always for external validation, but just for what it does for you to feel good about yourself.
Matt Wolfe: I hear there is another great success story of thinking outside the box. I, a lot of marketing agencies will probably be pretty rigid about sticking to what the ideal client is. Obviously, a big qualifier for yours would've been women and not men. And, what we miss in doing that sometimes is the opportunity to listen and realize who is actually showing up, who it actually is, who is the message actually speaking to, and adapting and pivoting our strategies a bit. To be inclusive of that. We miss the opportunity to learn our audience really is because we think we've already figured it out. So I think that's excellent that you've been able to
Bernadette Wagner: Speaking of reaching out to people that you don't think we're gonna reach out to, we only have two people who are monthly donors. Everybody else we have members membership fee of $25. Now, I've been told by more than one person, what, $25 a year? What? That's stupid. You should have, you know, whatever. But again, we're trying to be accessible, right? And but one of our donors, his wife, was at Meredith Health when I started the organization, and she was very jazzed about our, not our nonprofit, our walking to wellness program. And when her husband, Jim, retired, he started coming to Walking to Wellness, and he was there every single week, until she got a new job and moved to Florida. But Jim, every stinking month, he makes a monthly donation. And then there's a woman out in Chicago, Illinois, that read some of our blogs, and she makes a donation every single month. And it's just like, how does this happen? And why, but don't. Don't put up such rigid boxes that you leave people out. You know, it's just, it's fun to see that sometimes there are out-of-the-box people that you can reach out to.
Matt Wolfe: Mm-hmm.
Sarah Pattisall: I think that speaks back to, you know, again, that idea of connection and community and listening and vulnerability. When you're able to bring all of those elements together, you are going to learn things about somebody or a group of people that you wouldn't have otherwise known, and you are creating that space for those people.
You may not have thought would be interested in prime time for women, but because they have the opportunity to give and to gain, you learn they are, and it's really beautiful.
Bernadette Wagner: Of the things that we do, we send out a monthly newsletter, and we invite our members to submit articles that are worth that, give them the. The, the, if they have a desire to be seen and heard, we are there for them, and we really believe they might have an opportunity to inspire. Now, I do edit some of them.
We try to be pretty intentional about not being divisive. So if there are political articles written, it's not that I don't publish them, but I might make some edits because we are geared toward being inclusive. And so that's one thing. But we, we also believe that when women have a platform, and they have an opportunity, then they might feel empowered to actually take advantage of that.
And so it's the same thing with our Walking to Wellness group. We have a Calendly app where it's up. People can ask, " Can I speak at Walking to Wellness? So we've had. People from Habitat for Humanity.
We had a local photographer who liked taking pictures of older women. That was kind of her thing. And I loved that because she was saying not all older women want to be photographed with their grandchildren. Some of them wanna be standing in an evening dress or what.
And to me, just showing the diversity of who we are as women in our prime was beautiful. So, you know, to me. This Calendly app is there. People, can I send it out? They reserve a week. Some people reserve a week, three weeks out, or a month out. It doesn't matter. And then they show up on that Wednesday, and they do their five-minute talk.
And then we do Facebook post and LinkedIn post prior to their presentation and then again after, 'cause our role is to amplify these people in our community that are making a difference, that are willing to share their talents. And so, yeah, it gives us, it encourages people to be seen and heard, but it also provides diversity in who's speaking at our walking to wellness.
Matt Wolfe: I think something I'm really struck by, we've talked about outside the box, the power of connections, but also, a lot of it from a business standpoint. Oftentimes, when you think about solving issues with growth and scaling and expansion, people are looking for formulas, right. They're looking for a proven strategy.
They're looking for a recipe of how to do it. All the, and those things are out there, but sometimes that search causes us to discount the power of what happens if you just get the people you have with you in a room and give them a chance to be seen and heard, and to connect and to see what solutions they come up with. Sometimes the answers aren't else's formula, but the thing you have yet to have left room to bloom, blossom right from within your own
Bernadette Wagner: Yeah.
Bernadette Wagner: And I, I do think that Brand three does emphasize the importance of the story of connecting behind the story. That was one of the things that I learned from, Orsi early on and I could tell when we spoke that she really understood that she spent so much time just talking with me. And I, I feel like I follow her on LinkedIn and of the posts that she writes are so powerful.
I actually, one, one time she did a post and I. Emailed her and said, can I use your post in our newsletter? You know, I'll give you credit. But and I think it's because she understands the power of the story to reach out beyond just the product, you know, that the relationship matters as much as the product.
And I think that's pretty much true in all aspects of life. I really do. And I think
Sarah Pattisall: Absolute.
Bernadette Wagner: three has kind of captured that. Yeah.
Sarah Pattisall: Great. Well, and it's, it's one thing to tell the story, it's another thing to actually live it. And it's really lovely hearing your story and prime time for Women's Story because you all are wholly living that and inviting others to live it with you. And I know we're honored to be a part of that at Brand three.
Bernadette Wagner: Well, thank you so much. I appreciate you saying that. And brand three you know, the first year that we did International Women's Day, or she spoke and I felt like, it was a little bit of her being willing to make sure that we got off the ground after we took off. But I also know that that was when we did our survey, her presentation was that got the highest rating. And I think it was again, because, and it was about how she was doing her business and what she needed to keep in mind. And I feel like it resonated with people because of the authenticity. And I think that that's one of the things where brand three does a good job of capturing that.
Matt Wolfe: well, what we know is that whether you're a nonprofit or a business, the reason most people end up wasting a lot of time and money on marketing is because no one has sat with them to figure out how to tell the story of who they are and who they serve in a strategic way. And once you do that, you unlock so many benefits.
I mean, marketing does work better, but also sales or development and the search for donations is unlocked in a different way. That's more powerful. You discover new and better ways to serve people and create a stronger client or volunteer or participant experience. That one story begins to unlock so much understanding of who you are meant to serve and how you're meant to
Bernadette Wagner: Yeah.
Matt Wolfe: And I think that the authenticity from just having sat for a moment to think about the human story behind all of the marketing stuff. 'Cause it's all, it's all just stuff until it has the human story behind it. Whether it's a website or a ad or social media post.
Bernadette Wagner: Matt, I was gonna tell you one thing you asked me earlier about bumps in the road or difficulties of overcoming. And one of the things is at one point I paid for one of our board members to take a grant writing course. And together we worked on some grant write grants together. Our local community foundation was overseeing this process and, we did a great job, but we didn't get any of the grants. And when we went back and looked at the people who received the grants, it was the same for nonprofit organizations for like the last eight years. And I think it is very, very tough. And I think other businesses have this difficulty. It's one of the areas where I feel like I can resonate with business owners is it's hard to break into being the new kid on the block. And I think that's, that is a reality. And it is continues to be something that prime time for women would love to overcome at some point.
Matt Wolfe: In, in our experience, it usually has to do with having that story, but also expressing what is truly unique. Right? Something that is really unique about the organization that stands out with great clarity and then that begins to catch someone's attention. 'cause you're right, that's so much of that funding, so much of the, it's, it's just like business.
The relationships are there, the trust is there, that the money will be well spent. And it's the same trust gap that has to be
Bernadette Wagner: Right.
Matt Wolfe: Through the strategy.
Matt Wolfe: We like to wrap up with a little questionnaire because we really think if you're gonna market services, it's about relationship and trust and that means we're gonna have to know more than what an organization does, more than just information and, and those kind of things.
We need to know the people behind it. We need to know the people behind the brand so we have a behind the brand questionnaire that'll just let people get to know you just a little bit better before we sign off. And it is quick and mostly painless. And are you up
Bernadette Wagner: Okay.
Sarah Pattisall: I'll go ahead and kick it off here. Alright, Bernadette, we are putting you on the stage. You are seen and heard. It is karaoke night. What is your go-to song? I.
Bernadette Wagner: Oh, Lord. Take me home, country roads. I don't know.
Matt Wolfe: Nice.
Sarah Pattisall: That'll do. I like it.
Matt Wolfe: What is the last thing that made you laugh out Loud?
Bernadette Wagner: My grandson got to take home Pig Newton. he called the other day to say Mr. K, his gym teacher, gave him Pig Newton to take home 'cause he was the best listener. And Pig Newton is a. Purple papal mache pig. And he had to write a letter. He had to write an experience about having Pig Newton in his house. So he wrote a letter, which he read to me, that said, Mr. K, get me out of here. Charlie wants to eat me love Pig Newton help. And it was just so funny to see the 7-year-old have such a wacky sense of humor and love to talk about it.
Sarah Pattisall: I love the creativity. All right. What is your favorite way to get away from it all?
Bernadette Wagner: I like to go up to Blackwater Falls, West Virginia, with my husband. I.
Matt Wolfe: What smell reminds you of a specific place or time?
Bernadette Wagner: Hmm. A hot attic smell that I sometimes can smell, and it reminds me of my grandparents' home in Wildwood, New Jersey, when I was a little girl.
Sarah Pattisall: What is one day in your life that you would like to relive?
Bernadette Wagner: Hmm. Well, we even learned from the bad ones. So let me think. Gosh, I guess I've had a pretty good life. Yeah, come back to that one.
Matt Wolfe: Okay. You can take a pass.
Bernadette Wagner: Okay.
Matt Wolfe: It's a hard one. Three words would your loved ones use to describe you?
Bernadette Wagner: Talkative, creative, giving.
Sarah Pattisall: What would it mean for you to have truly succeeded in your work, and not necessarily with primetime for women, but for you in your work, what does that true success look like?
Bernadette Wagner: Looking back and not having any regrets. Feeling like even the tough spots were something that were meant to be, and that I learned from them.
Sarah Pattisall: That's a good answer.
Matt Wolfe: That's wonderful.
Matt Wolfe: Well, we can't thank you enough. Well, we hope that everyone who listens to this will go to www.primetimeforwomen.org. It's just that phrase, primetimeforwomen.org to learn more, to donate, to find out how to participate, to read some of the blogs, like the Culture, cooking, and Connections.
Sarah Pattisall: Yeah. Bernadette, have you written a book yet? Because if not, you need to, let's talk about it.
Bernadette Wagner: Okay. You're the second person that asked me that today. That's so funny. Thank you so much for your time. It's been an honor to be on your podcast, and I appreciate everything you all have done for Prime Time for Women.
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